Denial of total surrender,
some where he was holding back
a secret commitment to himself.
There was never a complete answer.
He wanted to believe in non-beliefs
without manipulating time,
like a non-being.
Nomadic life had not left any chance,
to accumulate the cold comforts
of possibilities. He did not want to sleep well
to loose the thread of thinking.
Confined in his solitude, his complete failure,
as though his god had betrayed,
he went on pushing his depression
to the edge of retribution.
To death, not quiet he was ready to question
so much backlog he had to clear,
thousands of tears to be wiped away
many of wounds to stich and endear.
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